THE PRESS CONFERENCE

Episode 2
THE PRESS CONFERENCE
Good evening taxpayers, I’m the Mansbridge. Tonight, we take you live to a surprise press conference being held by Prime Minister Stephen Harper. The conference is an unexpected move by the P.M., and many are speculating on what he might say. Some suspect this might be an unfair campaign tactic by Harper. We go now live to CBC correspondent Neil Macdonald who is on the scene.

Neil, what can you tell us about this conference? Is the Prime Minister starting off his campaign trail with a bang?

Peter are you there?
I’m always here, Neil. What can you tell us

about the conference?

Peter the air here tonight is one of secrecy and speculation. No one from the prime minister’s office is talking…
But we do know that several representatives from the Canada Space Agency are here; although the reason for their presence remains unclear.
Now Neil, is the – Peter I’m sorry

but the conference is about to start….

Alright Neil, I’ll see you when you get back and we can discuss your future. Take it away!

Uh, thanks Peter. Here’s the Prime Minister now…

 

Thank you all for coming. I know many of you are wondering why I have called you here this evening. Today is the dawn of a new day for Canada. Today, Canada enters the 21st century. Today, Canada embarks on a brave new endeavor…
…an enterprise more bold than the discovery of Atlantis. And when Canada has achieved this monumental feat, no one will challenge her, from Greenland to Columbia! It is my great honour to announce that Canada shall set foot on the Moon by the year 2012! (Gasp from the crowd) We will go to the Moon not because it is easy, but because it is hard. I will now open the floor to questions from the press.
Is this an election ploy?
No, going to the Moon is a non-partisan

issue that all Canadians can support, like sponsoring Olympic athletes.

Can you achieve this without

a majority government?

Well, if we don’t it will be

Michael Ignatieff’s fault,

maybe Jack Layton’s too.

We have always been a humble, apologetic nation of peace-keepers. Why go to the Moon?

It is time to show the world what

apologetic Peace-keepers are capable of. The world thinks we live in a cold, white, barren wasteland. They will think twice when they see us standing on the Moon!

“I want the international media to have a chance to ask questions…”
“Uh, well then, Canada to the Moon!”